General l’Hopital: Entry 1e

…not anti-longed

Electra Lysis walked into Room 231, put down her things and closed the double blinds. Then she flipped on the TV to see what was on the Mr. Rogers [TM] Cable Neighbourhood. Coming to the realization that there was nothing on the Life (serial) channel, she reached for the remote… as a man burst into the room and stumbled forward a pair of meters. He seized a package from the table. “Ana!” he shouted as he opened it. “You must not use this… lemma merangue pi?”

“That’s a parcel from my grandmother – Gran U. Larity,” Elly stated, perplexed. “She’s into pi and cayenne distribution. Who are you?”

“Er, I’m Max,” was the response. “Trying to intercept a Sir Vay package for Ana. Who are you?”

“Ana Lysis’ sister, Electra. What relation are you to Ana’s steady? That guy’s unnerving… I’m getting worried about heteroscedasticity.”

Max blinked. “I don’t know what that measure meant.”

“I think there’s a pattern in how Ana’s relationships vary,” Elly clarified.

Max shook his head. “Electra? Complex…”

“Meaning,” Elly sighed, “that they never last. I’d estimate – or approximate – it was three weeks with both Stu Dee and Sam Pull. So her time with Sir Vay is almost up.”

“I guess that’s characteristic,” Max acknowledged.

Elly sighed. “It’s getting such that I can’t concentrate on my work… the other day I got a hopital’s normal distribution charts mixed up with student tea distributions!”

“Chi…,” murmured Max.

“My job assessment can’t be good to say the least. So, just what is her latest companion up to?”

“Well, he was upset when he found out Ana was an imperfect model. So he knit a hideous looking ‘sigma’ hat – white, but with lurking variables that will glow in the dark. He hoped to embarrass her and horrify the local population… both those events cueing the breakup of their relationship.”

Elly gasped. “That’s a cue-cue plot! You sure you’re not gaussing?”

“Beta believe it.”

Elly rolled her eyes. “Typical. They always give up on Ana when they observe her modelling is experimental.”

“So… the package?” Max pressed, looking very antsy.

“Oh, the one by the matches has been here since I arrived.”

But as Max turned to get it Ana walked into the room. “Would you believe it?” Ana commented. “I was so rushed to leave I grabbed a wrong ski – isn’t this Ron’s ski?”

“Wonder what the likelihood of this was,” Elly sighed.

To be concluded…

–Greg “hologrami” Taylor

PreviousMISC INDEXNext

[Nothing to add this time. Are you amazed how it’s suddenly coming together? Me too. We’re almost done.]

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